"IF YOU BELIEVE, CLAP YOUR HANDS": Since a children's author has been chosen to write an official sequel to Peter Pan, James Finn Garner at The Morning News has printed the hilarious cover letters for several rejected applicants. My favorite was:

It is with great humility and gratitude that I submit my completed manuscript for the sequel to J.M. Barrie’s masterpiece, entitled Wendy Shrugged. I apologize in advance for the size of the box.